Pull Quote: “I am excited to host an ambassador who supports international commerce, but I have no idea what a ‘Montana’ is.”-Chinese Businessman Lao Ood
Montanans statewide expressed their exuberant joy late December when it was announced President Obama intended to nominate Sen. Max Baucus (D-Mont.) for U.S. Ambassador to China. The move has been described as an intelligent move by Montana voters, and a “great way to get him out of our state’s Senate seat to a place we won’t have to see him again.”
Sending Baucus to China is a rare move supported by the Montana Democrat and Republican parties. Billings Democrat Patricia Oswin said she was glad the party was rid of the “NRA sellout,” and proceeded into a profanity-laden tirade about the Senator’s opposition to single-payer healthcare in order to line the pockets of his health insurance industry donors. Meanwhile, Sidney Republican Jimmy Sontaran voiced his glee at the Senator’s departure, citing Baucus’ refusal to vote against removing tax subsidies for American companies that outsource jobs internationally, and his fast-tracking a bill through Congress that outlawed hand-rolled cigarette stores after receiving a generous donation from Philip Morris.
In response to the announcement, Chinese-American citizens voiced their warning to Sen. Baucus to buy a good smog mask in advance and sent him a personalized desk placard that read, “低劣的政客.” The recently repaired Republican robot Steve Daines reiterated his desire to occupy the Senator’s soon-to-be-vacated seat, and prominent Chinese businessman Lao Ood was quoted as saying, “I am excited to host an ambassador who supports international commerce, but I have no idea what a ‘Montana’ is.”