A night of glitz and glamour turned to guts and gore Friday night when the second annual Blue and Gold Ball was suddenly crashed by a pack of bloodthirsty velociraptors. Current reports set the massacre’s toll at five dead, 17 injured and 64 rented tuxedos that will not be getting their deposits back. The ferocious dinosaurs caught the event security staff off-guard, who were anticipating rowdy drunks, but not hungry prehistoric death machines.
Despite the carnage and pending lawsuits, Blue and Gold Committee President Aaron Chipotle insists the Ball was “an overwhelming success. The attack was nothing more than a small setback. I still feel, and I believe students will back me up, that the event was enjoyed by all and I hope everyone will be back next year!”