Following his narrow victory in the election, newly re-elected Senator Jon Tester re-emerged after a week-long disappearance with a new look. The senator surprised supporters at a rally in Great Falls by emerging as a 150 foot robotic version of himself, declaring his new title to be “Mecha-Tester.” He hopes that his new robotic body can be a symbol of Montanan industry might and to deliver the message that, “No one f***s with Montana.”
Senator Mecha-Tester called his new look a testament to his support of Montanan economic growth. His new form stands approximately 150 feet and 11 inches tall and weighs 40,000 tons. His metallic hull is composed of copper and silver mined in Butte. His new form is powered by a colossal ‘heart,’ fueled by burning coal mined in Eastern Montana and solar panels constructed by Stevensville-based green power company Oasis Montana. The entire hull is coated in a diamond plating, allowing the senator to survive asteroid impacts and harsh negative ad campaigns with nary a scratch.
The senator’s most imposing new feature, though, is a nuclear-powered fusion cannon known as “The Code of the West,” replacing his right hand. The cannon’s technology was developed by the Montana State University Department of Physics and is powered by black market uranium.
Tester’s mechanical transformation began when local technology firm Image Labs International offered to construct a mechanical replacement for Tester’s left hand, known for his three missing fingers lost in a meat-grinder accident. Tester then chose to incorporate companies statewide for what he calls “a true collaborative Montanan effort.”
The move has been criticized by some for its perceived excess, but Mecha-Tester defended his actions, saying, “When you embark on an ambitious undertaking, it’s all or nothing.”
At press time, Mecha-Tester had been called away to Billings to fight Conservadorah, a giant, three-headed elephant believed to be the mutated form of former Congressman Denny Rehberg after absorbing the post-election hate and malice of the Montana Republican Party.