Long-distance lovin’

Q: My boyfriend is far away and he wants to do more sexual stuff, but he doesn’t like phone sex. What should I do?

A: Ah, the long distance relationship — the thing that truly tests the limits of creativity with a partner. Luckily here at the Sexponent we’ve got ideas for fun things to do when geography gets in the way.

First things first, phone sex might be something you consider trying again. If you haven’t done it a few times, it can be a bit awkward. Both of you have to be less self-conscious than usual, you have to focus on being extremely descriptive, and you have to get creative. If it didn’t work the first few times, maybe bargain with your significant other and give it another go.

If it’s really not your agreed cup of tea, there’s always technology on your side in the form of Skype. Skype sex is becoming a whole new way to be with your significant other — you’ve got video and sound. However, beware and take Skype sex with a grain of salt. Skype’s connection is notoriously sketchy at times, and pauses and frozen screens do happen — imagine them happening at exactly the wrong moment. If you and your partner are brave enough to weather the glitch storm, give it a try. While it could quickly become more akin to a comedy sketch than a sexy experience, Skype can be a great tool in your sexual arsenal.

If you and your partner are seeing one another in the near future, talk about it. That sounds odd, but discussing what you want to do with each other, what you will wear, what’s going to happen, etc. — all of these things can help you both get excited about seeing one another while stimulating your imaginations.

Last, but certainly not least, try writing dirty letters to one another. The written word has spanned centuries, and putting pen to paper can be a fun way to keep things a little more lively. Use your college vocabulary and have some fun with it.