The last Sexponent asked the question of a potential threesome.

To recap what was discussed: One needs to go about this carefully and thoughtfully. Make sure you and your partner are comfortable engaging in the magnificent threesome. Lack of communication in any relationship issue can be potentially damaging. You wouldn’t break up over whether or not the toilet seat was left up, but you might over a third party in the bedroom.

If you two are still set on having a threesome, take baby steps.

What about the participants in a threesome? Establishing your extra player is necessary for this adventure. The key ingredient: Each person should be in agreement about the groundrules.

Nonetheless, this isn’t an easy task; finding the third person can be awkward. I suggest not scrolling through Craigslist or looking in a bar to find him or her. Instead, find someone you—at least kind of—know and trust. All of you will be in your birthday suits so you should feel at ease with this person, but not be upset if you have to cut them out of your life if/when the act goes awry.

Consider his or her sexual resume; remember, when engaging in intercourse with this individual you’re sleeping with everyone they’ve slept with too, and nobody wants any STDs running around. For all your sakes, wear a condom—a different one with each partner.

Inviting a third participant into the bedroom is a big deal, and may seem unattractive in the pre-penetration phases. When it comes to the main event, it is okay to back down if you have any hesitation. If the situation starts to get hostile, feel free to employ a safety-word (we recommend starfish).

Ultimately, this experience is meant to fulfill a fantasy or broaden a relationship. In other words, it should be about the two of you; unless one of you breaks it off to run away with the third wheel. Afterall, how many relationships actually survive a threesome?